Favorite Comedies

[YYZ66]

What are those coming out of her nose?
Are those....Spaceballs?
Oh ****, there goes the planet.

[JonM229]

If you can read this you don't need glasses

[YYZ66]

I *heart* Uranus

dang, no heart emoticons!

[JonM229]

How come nobody told me my ****** was so big?!?

[YYZ66]

OK Doctor, we're done with you. Why don't you go practice your putts?
Of course you know, I'll still have to charge you.
Bet she gives great helmet.

[JonM229]

1 2 3 4 5? That's amazing. It's the same combination I have on my luggage.

[YYZ66]

*alarm sound*
Abandon ship, abandon ship! Women and Mogs first!

What the hell was that?

That was my virgin alarm! It's programmed to go off before you!

[Purple Nurple]

OK, are these from memory or have we digressed to copy/paste?

[JonM229]

Mine's all memory. I can do several movies all the way through.

[JonM229]

He said "the sheriff is near!"

[YYZ66]

[quote name='Purple Nurple' date='19 November 2009 - 09:55 PM' timestamp='1258682138' post='287010']
OK, are these from memory or have we digressed to copy/paste?
[/quote]

Nope, mine are from memory. I used to watch Spaceballs every weekend for several straight months. I'd go to my buddy's house and watch it, probably only because it pissed off his wife.

[JonM229]

I get yelled at a lot whenever my girlfriend and I watch a Mel Brooks movie.

[JonM229]

Whenever I'm talking to my father, there's a lot of Godfather lines spoken. We've progressed past actual conversation.

[YYZ66]

[quote name='JonM229' date='19 November 2009 - 09:57 PM' timestamp='1258682222' post='287013']
He said "the sheriff is near!"
[/quote]

There's a Mel Brooks I haven't watched nearly enough, and it's probably his best.

It's twue, it's twue!!!

[JonM229]

"Are we awake?"
"That depends. Are we...black?"
"Yes, we are."
"Well then, we're awake. But we're very puzzled."

[YYZ66]

See this?

Steady as a rock.

But this is my shooting hand.
*shakes violently*

[JonM229]

Well raise my rent. You are the Kid.

[YYZ66]

What in the wild, wild world of sports is going on here?

[JonM229]

Dock that **** a day's pay for nappin' on the job.

[YYZ66]

dang, I can't hang with blazing saddles.
Back to Spaceballs!

I told you never to call me here. This is an unlisted wall!

Snotty beamed me twice last night, and it was wonderful.

Come back you fat, bearded *****!

[JonM229]

What's the matter Colonel Sanders, chicken?

[YYZ66]

What the hell was that?

It was Spaceball I, they've gone.... to plaid.

[JonM229]

No no, go past this part. In fact, never play this again.

[YYZ66]

Coffee sir?

Yes, I always have coffee before checking the radar. Everyone knows that, right?

Yes sir!
*covering nards*

[JonM229]

Mornin' ma'am. And isn't it a lovely mornin'?
Up yours ****

[YYZ66]

Vespa. Vespa.

Daddy, is that you?

Of course it is. Would I lie?

*faints*

Fooled you!

[PuRock]

Underrated Comedy: Freddy got Fingered

Daddy would you like some sausages. Daddy would you like some sausages.

[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLh8MnKeoAo[/media]

[FerrariFan87]

When will then be now?

Soon!

[FerrariFan87]

Robin Hood: Blinkin, listen to me. They've taken the castle!
Blinkin: I thought it felt a bit drafty. Course, this never would have happened if your father was alive.
Robin Hood: He's dead?
Blinkin: Yes.
Robin Hood: And my mother?
Blinkin: She died of pneumonia while... oh, you were away...
Robin Hood: My brothers?
Blinkin: There were all killed by the plague.
Robin Hood: My dog, Pongo?
Blinkin: Run over by a carriage.
Robin Hood: My goldfish, Goldie?
Blinkin: Eaten by the cat.
Robin Hood: [on the verge of tears] My cat?
Blinkin: Choked on the goldfish.
[pause]
Blinkin: Oh, it's good to be home, ain't it, Master Robin?

[theblackdog]

Blinkin: Robin, it's so good that you're home! *hugs Venus de milo statue* *gasp* You've lost your arms in battle! But you grew a nice set of boobs!

AhChoo: Hey Blinkin!
Blinkin: Did you say Abe Lincoln?

Little John: A toll is a toll, and a roll is a roll, and if we don't get no tolls, then we don't eat no rolls....I made that one up myself.

Robin: My dear, you're shivering, what are you wearing under that nightie?
Marion: Practically nothing
Robin: *presses up against her, BANG! sound, wincing in pain*
Marion: Oh, except for that, it's an Everlast!

Rottingham: That's it, I was mad before, but now I'm getting really pissed off!
AhChoo: Now that you're near the horses weiner, I'd worry about getting pissed on!

AhChoo: Man, I hope she's wearing her metal underwear
*Sound of jackhammer*

King Richard: From now on, all the toilets in the kingdom shall be called...Johns!